Originally Posted by
Violette
Then let me ruin it for you:
On a porch swing.-To be discovered by the neighbors children Who run around for the next ten years saying 'EWW' when they see you.
Inside an unknown rocky cave or limestone cave.-Where you scare the bats living there, and they all shit on you at the same time And then the tide comes in
In the weight room at your gym.-To have the weights fall on your toeAnd smashes the floor
In your not-yet-finished new build house.-Unfinished for a reason, you fall through the floor to discover a graveyard of skeletons in the waterlogged basement you didn't know you had And then the surveyor and rigging crew turn up
On the hood of your car on a deserted gravel road.-Not so deserted, you are caught on Google cam
On a pool table.Which crashes waking up the entire household.
On top of the washer... while it's running.Thusly finishing off the machine, the relationship, and the wash And the police
On a soft rug in front of a fireplace.Where embers fly out and burn you right on the balls Sparking a fire on the rug
On a secluded island beach.And sand gets everwhere Not to mention sandflies
In the backyard under the stars.In a pile of the neighbors great dane's poop Refer to neighbours children
In the woods after it rains.On just enough of an incline to slide several hundred meters down a hillBreaking your leg in several places
On a motorcycle.Which doesn't belong to you, falls over and damages the antique marble floor And then breaks your toe
In a public restroom.And you catch pubic liceAnd get reported to the police
In an airplane restroom -- join the mile high club!Setting off the smoke alarm, are arrested and handcuffed to your chair for the rest of the 14 hour flight Just have a fag, its less embarassing
On a train in the middle of the night.To be discovered by the entire car, when the lights come on for an emergencyAlso mind out for the jolts.