Sweetie?????????

I know your busy (wink wink) but i need to ask you a q.

Just had lunch at Westville and will need to go for a crap shortly.Just wondering ,should i consult with my lawyer beforehand or is would it be ok to just bog ahead.

Sort of like like the doctors with their you have 6 months to live.Its always 6 months,never 5 mins or 5 days or two days.

Sorry Mr Westside,but we have very bad news for you?

Whats that my ex mother is in the building?

Nope,you have 5 mins to live.

Really.

Yes.

Our aim now is your quality of life for these next five mins.Would you like anything in the meantime.Some tea?

Hope dont have time.

Well if you want anything just let us know.Well be in the cafe for lunch for a half hour so you can call then.

But ill be fuckin dead by then.

Well would you like anything now?

Let me think about it.

Hurry on because my lunch will be cold.

ffs i only have 3.5 mins left jesus.

35 years later...................Morning West.

Lawyers ,doctors,all the fuckin same,
Westside.