View Full Version : Elizabeth will you marry me?
Clint Eastwood
16-12-08, 14:22
My dear Elizabeth Ive met no one like you in my life. Your one of a kind. Your funny, unpredictable, fiesty and good in the sack. What more can a man want in a woman. I dont know if you can cook or clean. That doesnt matter Im wealthy enough to hire a private chef to cook for us. Would Gordon Ramsey be good enough for you. We could get a few lovely ladys from this website to clean for us. Anyone of your choice. I live in a mansion in Dubbers. We could rename it Hilton towers. What Im saying is Elizabeth, will you do me the great honour of becoming my wife. Remember I busted you out of jail. Ill give up the cigars. Ill even clean the toilet with my tongue. Anything, just marry me and youll want for nothing. Ill change my name to Clint Hilton. I believe Carlos Marvado is a bit of a preacher here. So he will marry us. The honeymoon will be in Barbados. I have a diamond engagement ring for you. I also got you the juke box you requested. Mr Gene Hunt will be my best man. We hate each others guts, but hes the only person I know on this site. Im down on one knee and this hip is killing me. Dont keep me hanging Elizabeth whats it to be.
carlos marvado
16-12-08, 15:22
Sorry Clint, but I married Hot Lizzy off to Flyshit...I mean Flypan some time ago.
But if you can manage to control your beastial urges until I can arrange to have her petition for a divorce expedited, I will be more than happy to officiate at another one of her marriages.
You will even be entitled to a discount rate marriage service, as she keeps me very busy, what with her ever changing domestic arrangements. While you're waiting, would you care to direct another movie or maybe spend a little time with some of the nice ladies on this site. :D:D:D
Between Hot Lizzy, Liz Taylor and those lovely Collins sisters, I'm kept very busy indeed.
OK you little spaghetti western wanka u r startin ta piss us orf. Lizbet is not da marrying kind she is to much of a free sprit ta get hitched to a wrinkly old cowboy like u
R U GODFATHA????? EH????? R YA???:mad::mad::mad::mad::mad:
carlos marvado
16-12-08, 16:02
Ease up boys, he's joining the old family firm....the Pine Fresh Butt Plug brigade.....after all, he swings every which way but loose. :D:D:D
Ease up boys, he's joining the old family firm....the Pine Fresh Butt Plug brigade.....after all, he swings every which way but loose. :D:D:D
We r sorry Mr Marvado its jus we r very protective of r dear sweet innoce……hang on…ok so she ain’t all dat innocent but we made a promise ta er ole man on his death bed (ok it woz us dat put him there fair nough) but we is ruddy dammed if we r gonna let a class bird like Lizbet marry a muppet like dat!!
Put us down for a few extra large an noblely pine cones as we r gonna find out if n clint is as tough as e makes out. he gets r goat e does an naw mistake :mad::mad:
And we wanna try out da delux model on a dead rapper we hear is hangin around the gaff like a bad smell. We ates bleedin rappers. We’ll see ow he takes to it an all goin swell we will take a few thou for da east euro market plus da bro wants one an all for himself not me UNDERSTAND?
Clint Eastwood
16-12-08, 20:51
Ok punks do you feel lucky. Lets see what your made of. You cant even speak the language your country invented. You english wankers. Im having Elizabeth weather you like it or not. Im coming to Cork tonight to see her. Im going to fly into her room like the milk tray man. Instead of milk tray itll be a diamond ring. I hope shes not on the top floor otherwise I dont know how Ill get that jukebox in. Flyplan is a lucky man Carlos lucky indeed. We could still get married. I heard she used to go to Delhi and Dubai. In those a man could have several wives. I dont know if it applies the other way around. But she wears the trousers in our relationship and shes got more balls than most men.
i dunno her, this elizabeth cuddy-heur. she mus be some ride wenever yous boys all are lukin 2 buck her.
elizabeth, wud u not marry me dauter?
i,m yung an handsom an a gud wee singer an dancer elizabeth. so marry me
xxx
eoghan
thehighwayman
17-12-08, 17:06
What about that wee Vickers girl. She'll be devastated when she finds out your after another woman.
What about that wee Vickers girl. She'll be devastated when she finds out your after another woman.
oh thon wan Dianne, i took her virginity you know :cool:
giddy oul heure wanted to houl my hand and stare in2 me eyes and all that shite. :( so i got the ould fat guy daniel to buy me 6 tins of harp lager.
dianne thought this was all grown-up of me, so i split it with her and let her drink 4 of em, so she,d be more pissed than me :D
i toul the heure that I LOVED HER and wanted to marry her but cudden cos i had a wee problem with me wee mickey :D
so she wanted to see, being pissed and all. so, i asked her cud i put me mickey into her fanny just for a wee minute and out again :cool:
AND SHE LET ME :eek:
and then i let her rub the warm sticky stuff into me HAIR :)
Clint Eastwood
18-12-08, 14:43
You should be locked up you paedophile. What age is she. She cant be 16 yet.
You should be locked up you paedophile. What age is she. She cant be 16 yet.
thon wan dianne she fookin 17, the daft milly was a year ouler than me.
so i,m the lucky wan getin aff wi an ouler cuddy, arent i ??????? :D:D
she was aving a wee doze one day, so i slipped the hand down the front of her blouseadult-feel-upadult-feel-up
yeugh!!!! :( :( :( i foun this soft plastic thing like a chicken breast :confused: :confused:
so i stuffed it down the front of me Y-fronts cos all the girlys like a big bulge :cool:
Clint Eastwood
18-12-08, 15:08
You lucky man. I also like the older woman in Elizabeth. The more wrinkles the better.
You lucky man. I also like the older woman in Elizabeth. The more wrinkles the better.
wrinkles :eek: hope shes not an oul granny :o still, som o them are still a bit FIT like some o me mates ma,s are. i wudden mind loosing me cherry to an oul dirty wan like urs clint :) as long as the stretch marks weren,t too bad :eek:
i seen danni minogues face once an it was full of wrinkles, it looked like a balloon that had went down but next time i seen her she was smooth as plate and wen i felt her hole she tried to frown and near broke her face :eek:
Clint Eastwood
20-12-08, 17:38
So Elizabeth now that your back, will you marry me? I've been waiting for days for an answer. It's been the cliff hanger in this soap for days.
We r sorry Mr Marvado its jus we r very protective of r dear sweet innoce……hang on…ok so she ain’t all dat innocent but we made a promise ta er ole man on his death bed (ok it woz us dat put him there fair nough) but we is ruddy dammed if we r gonna let a class bird like Lizbet marry a muppet like dat!!
Put us down for a few extra large an noblely pine cones as we r gonna find out if n clint is as tough as e makes out. he gets r goat e does an naw mistake :mad::mad:
And we wanna try out da delux model on a dead rapper we hear is hangin around the gaff like a bad smell. We ates bleedin rappers. We’ll see ow he takes to it an all goin swell we will take a few thou for da east euro market plus da bro wants one an all for himself not me UNDERSTAND?
Leave it out boys........i like him - infact I love you Clint and its a big YES from me........
Ron n Reg leave him alone he bust me outta jail, just cos you pitched up with the old rover to take me back home doesn't mean you own me.....Bad enough with that Nick sending me off to Cork to turn tricks.....mind I did have a great time.
So The Swallow or Spit retiring in a town near you soon - says yes, as does del monte.
xxxxxxxxxx The Hot One..........She's back and she's ready to attack the Listerine - xx:eek:
Clint Eastwood
20-12-08, 18:04
I'm honoured you said yes Elizabeth. Its been worth waiting for. So how about a lavish Christmas Day wedding?
I'm honoured you said yes Elizabeth. Its been worth waiting for. So how about a lavish Christmas Day wedding?
I would but i'm a tad busy that day...........hows about a nice long engagement.......... maybe you could come up and see me some time when im in Ireland next month - did you get me that Wurlitzer yet........
Rodeoman said he was going to sort one out for me if you wouldn't.........hes a cool dude - he did call me a few times to see if i was ok.........nice bloke. BBJ also spoke with him too -Just shows you - not the bad girl that all loved to hate any more.......
Love you babe......... Still Heather and Minty now that was a real love affair.
The Listerine retiring Queen at any old town near you soon......... xxx :eek::eek::eek:
Clint Eastwood
20-12-08, 18:41
A long engagement is fine. I already have aquired a wurlitzer for you as a wedding gift for you. You just name it Ill get it. I will see you next month when your back in the emerald isle. Then we can get down and dirty and have lots of fun with listerene. Then we can discuss wedding arrangements. When you come back we can make a start on a family. Some little Clints and Lizzies, now wouldnt that be nice.
Clint Eastwood
22-12-08, 15:45
So when are we getting married Elizabeth.
JOHNNEY ALLEN
22-12-08, 16:11
Be real here clint everyone knows lizbet is mine & mine only she would never marry you & even if she did i would just send jake round now sling your hook:cool:
Be real here clint everyone knows lizbet is mine & mine only she would never marry you & even if she did i would just send jake round now sling your hook:cool:
Going to P.M. You please read it ..........its no joke to me can say no more.
I would but i'm a tad busy that day...........hows about a nice long engagement.......... maybe you could come up and see me some time when im in Ireland next month - did you get me that Wurlitzer yet........
Rodeoman said he was going to sort one out for me if you wouldn't.........hes a cool dude - he did call me a few times to see if i was ok.........nice bloke. BBJ also spoke with him too -Just shows you - not the bad girl that all loved to hate any more.......
Love you babe......... Still Heather and Minty now that was a real love affair.
The Listerine retiring Queen at any old town near you soon......... xxx :eek::eek::eek:
No matter what I have said Lizzie, I would like to wish you a very HAPPY XMAS. This is the season of Peace & Goodwill. Hope you also have a happy & healthy New Year!
Clint Eastwood
22-12-08, 16:37
Elizabeth forget this Johnny Allen joker. Where was he when you were in jail. I busted you out, what a night that was. I can handle Jake. Is he the one from the dark side who bans people and edits their posts.
So when are we getting married Elizabeth.
Looks like you got some competition for Lizbets affection from J Allen sunshine. Jast remember its us dat as da final say on who marries r dear sweet listerine Lizbet.
it betta not be a shotgun wedding r yur nad bag will be removed forthwite :mad::mad:
Clint Eastwood
22-12-08, 16:50
Listen punks Elizabeth is her own woman. She will decide who she marries. I trust the lady will make the right choice. Why would she be involved with gangsters like you and Johnny Allen when she can have an honest law enforcer like me. Remember I broke her out. Where were all you when she was in the big house.
u orrible little toe rag u could’nt break out in a sweet. She got erself out by turning tricks ta da prison guards an nickin dare keys on the vinegar strokes mate.
U broke er out? pull da ovva one mate it plays misty for me :mad:
JOHNNEY ALLEN
22-12-08, 18:06
Listen punks Elizabeth is her own woman. She will decide who she marries. I trust the lady will make the right choice. Why would she be involved with gangsters like you and Johnny Allen when she can have an honest law enforcer like me. Remember I broke her out. Where were all you when she was in the big house.
Clint face it you havent got wat it takes to please a lady such as lizbet & i think shell agree & as myself & ron & reg go way back i think u should disapear before we make you:D
Clint Eastwood
22-12-08, 18:11
Go on then make me. My magnum will blow you all away. You lot only use nives.
u orrible little toe rag u could’nt break out in a sweet. She got erself out by turning tricks ta da prison guards an nickin dare keys on the vinegar strokes mate.
U broke er out? pull da ovva one mate it plays misty for me :mad:
Sorry lads, he got me up the duff so it will be a shotgun wedding, got one that you managed to saw off the other week when you did that job.
Thanks fellas.........love you loads........... Hot Lizzy Soon to be Hot Mrs Eastwood.
If its twin lads i promise to name them after you xxx ;););)
Clint Eastwood
22-12-08, 21:50
That was fast Elizabeth. You didnt tell me you were up the duff. Im presuming Im the father. Hot Mrs Eastwood has got a nice ring to it. If its twin girls they could be called Veronica and Regina. They'll still be Ron n Reg.
That was fast Elizabeth. You didnt tell me you were up the duff. Im presuming Im the father. Hot Mrs Eastwood has got a nice ring to it. If its twin girls they could be called Veronica and Regina. They'll still be Ron n Reg.
Johnney Allen will be chuffed since his place is now called r and r. Remember........it used to be Scarlets..........i do love that name even though it has a red ring about it. As in Ginger...........
xxx
Johnney Allen will be chuffed since his place is now called r and r. Remember........it used to be Scarlets..........i do love that name even though it has a red ring about it. As in Ginger...........
xxx
Im bored of being single and i want to marry you........the labour pains were just a touch premature yesterday but i dont want to work when i have a little clint or two to feed so whatja say - wanna marry me then????
:confused::confused::confused:
Clint Eastwood
23-12-08, 18:22
The answer is a big yes. Yes of course Ill marry you. I have been waiting for this moment for weeks. You have just made my day. Dont worry Ill look after you. You dont have to work another day. I have enough money in the bank to take care of our little family. Only one problem this Gene Hunt has arrested me and Ill be inside for Christmas. I know a few smooth lawyers who can get me out. Im an innocent man. I hope you can wait for me the way I waited for you. I should be out by St Stephens Day at least. All the solicitors are getting legless at the bar so they cant deal with me till then. Look after the little Clints for me untill I return.
Don't be such an idiot gimp Eastwood. You don't want to get married. Play the field like me. I know I was married to drunken Sue Ellen. That was enough to put me off for life. I'll take you under my wing Clint. I'll show you how to play the field. I am the ultimate B*****d and I'm proud of it. I've had liasons with some of the most beautiful women in the world. Why do you think I've stumbled on to this site.
Don't be such an idiot gimp Eastwood. You don't want to get married. Play the field like me. I know I was married to drunken Sue Ellen. That was enough to put me off for life. I'll take you under my wing Clint. I'll show you how to play the field. I am the ultimate B*****d and I'm proud of it. I've had liasons with some of the most beautiful women in the world. Why do you think I've stumbled on to this site.
You leave my Clint alone............and don't you be talking about my best friend Sue Ellen like that.......her shoulder pads are famous all over the world.
Ignore him he is just a jealous man, he wants me and he is trying to make a cunning plan to take me away from you.
Liz still hot to trot for you client leave the geriatric old fart alone cos he is lonsome and is a secret drinker himself.
Lizzy:D:D:D
Indeed I am partial to a drink myself missy.
Sue Ellen has made me a fortune with those shoulder pads. The Dallas Cowboys use her design. It helped keep Ewing Oil afloat during the Gulf War. That Cliff Barnes and Jeremy Wendell tried to steal my Daddys company. But I came out fighting and came out on top as usual. Nobody beats old JR :D :D :D
I meant no harm just giving him the benefit of my experience. I hope you'll both be happy together. He seems a good man. Before you both get married Hot Lizzy. How about me and you get all hot and steamy in that jacuzzi?
Indeed I am partial to a drink myself missy.
Sue Ellen has made me a fortune with those shoulder pads. The Dallas Cowboys use her design. It helped keep Ewing Oil afloat during the Gulf War. That Cliff Barnes and Jeremy Wendell tried to steal my Daddys company. But I came out fighting and came out on top as usual. Nobody beats old JR :D :D :D
I meant no harm just giving him the benefit of my experience. I hope you'll both be happy together. He seems a good man. Before you both get married Hot Lizzy. How about me and you get all hot and steamy in that jacuzzi?
I hope you can come see me with sue ellen perhaps a little threesome or foursome with some time in the jaccuzzi......... i look forward to it.
Can you see how much i look like sue ellen......... ;););)
Your alot prettier than Sue Ellen Hot Lizzy. And your alot younger. Sue Ellen is in her mid sixties now. I like young women. A foursome sounds good. Who's the fourth person. It has to be a woman no men allowed, only me :D