Sex used to be a taboo subject, but not anymore. And the same can be said about the sex industry and all the people who choose this as their work field. While there still are many who prefer not to talk about this, the majority feels just fine when something about porn or sex workers comes up.
Why? Because there is nothing wrong with it after all, and people in the industry are as normal as they can be. Your neighbour could be doing porn movies right now, and at least one of your work colleagues is regularly checking sexy websites, if not all of them.
So why would there be something wrong if your best friend was a sex worker? There is nothing wrong with that, but there might be with the way you are thinking about it.
Let me ask you something: what do you know about sex work? If you are reading this you probably know a thing or two, but from the consumer perspective. And it’s about time to go a bit deeper into this subject.
Why Do We Sometimes Judge People Who Work in the Sex Industry?
The first reason is that, as mentioned above, many used to consider sex itself a taboo subject. Not anymore, of course, but somewhere deep in our minds, we still hold on to the idea that this is something too intimate to be a job. And this is something everybody should forget about.
Sex is a way to give ourselves and each other pleasure. Sometimes love is involved in the equation, while other times, it’s not. And there are lonely days when people watch porn and masturbate for pleasure, but there are also moments when they hire an escort. Easy peasy, right?
The escort’s role is to make people feel amazing, just like a masseuse does, and what the hell, exactly like the hairdresser and the lady that does your manicure. After each session, you feel amazing, don’t you?
Often, People Judge Because They Assume
Many get their ideas about things they know nothing about personally, from movies. So, based on film depictions of sex work, some assume they know everything about what motivates sex workers, how this job makes them feel, or what experiences they had in the past.
Some believe the only people who choose this job are those with a dark past, who have been treated wrongly by the men in their family or their boyfriends, or who are still victims of poverty, having little to no education. And none of these ideas is usually right.
While any sex worker can be subject to exploitation because this is still a risky industry mostly because of the lack of legislation, you don’t know them, their past, or what’s best for them, and you don’t have the right to judge their choices. Of course, this doesn’t mean that glorifying the industry is the right thing to do. So what is the correct way to see and feel about this? That’s an easy answer: you should think of it as a normal industry, with workers, just like you and me.
What to Do When Your Best Friend Comes Out as A Sex Worker
First of all, don’t be shocked, because as mentioned above, everybody could be doing that without talking about it, since judgmental people are everywhere. And second, please don’t try to save any of your friends from their own choices.
Maybe you find it hard to believe that somebody could enjoy this job. But then again, I find it very difficult to believe that people who work in trading are very happy with their career choice. I am also intrigued by those who chose to work twenty years in a corporation. The same one! But this doesn’t mean that every time I meet my friends who work at IBM, I try to save them from their terrifying mistakes of being 10 hours in an office every single day.
However, if your friend complains about it and shares problems and unhappiness, you can, of course, offer your help. That’s what people do!
Don’t Assume Sex Workers Have STD
There are so many people who instantly think about STDs when they talk about the sex industry. The truth is that the only reason why somebody thinks an escort probably has an STD is the lack of education. Which people who work in the sex industry have. Yes, they usually have a lot more knowledge about sexual health and how to practice safe sex than others.
They are actually the ones that educated their clients, teaching them the measures that can be taken against a disease that can be easily transmitted through sex.
So, when people tell you they are sex workers, don’t automatically think there is a tie between their job and “having sexually-transmitted diseases”. That’s just silly!
Your Friend Is Still Your Friend
If you’ve known somebody for a long time, and you had a great relationship, the fact that you suddenly find out her or his job is different than you believed, can’t change the way you feel about this person. And if it does, this only makes you a shitty person, doesn’t it?
Let me give you an example. If you are a programmer who decides to quit the job to become a travel writer, will your friends judge you or put an end to your relationship? Well, if they do, they weren’t actually your friends. They are just some people who thought you have a cool job, and once you changed it, you stop being important.
It doesn’t matter the job people choose, but how they are as human beings. And sex workers are just normal people. They can be as intelligent, loving, witty, ironic, sad or happy as any other person you meet.
She is most well known for her sex advice pieces, yet also has a major interest in sexual health and other serious issues. However, this is all done with a quirky style that is unmistakably hers.
When she isn't working, Anna is a fitness fanatic, and enjoys going away with her partner for various weekend trips.
- Anal Play With Escorts: The Right Way To Do It - August 19, 2019
- Your Best Friend Could Be Working in the Sex Industry And That’s Fine - July 1, 2019
- You Can Now Clone Your Own Willy - June 6, 2016
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