Some couples like to role play, and others watersports, but one of the oldest, most sensual experiences you can have is going swinging.

With more swinging communities around than ever before, it’s a great time for couples and singles of any age to try it out. Before take the next step, there are some essential tips to bear in mind.

DO find a community  

Swinging has been around since ancient times. This means there are swinging communities scattered across Ireland. Certain laws make it hard for people to host swinging parties without facing legal repercussions, but social media platforms offer access to safe spaces where people can enjoy their swinging lifestyle without having to worry.

It may take you a while to find a community that works for both of you. Some communities focus on specific fantasies, like BDSM, while others may exist for certain age groups. Whatever the case, you must treat each community with respect. Kink shaming is not tolerated in swinging, and for good reason. Stick to this golden rule, and you’re likely to be welcomed with open arms. If you can’t find the right community for you, there’s nothing to say you can’t create your own.

DON’T stop communicating

Sex has never worked out when there’s a lack of communication. Whether it’s letting your partner know what turns you on, or telling then you’re not in the mood for the night, good communication is vital.

This communication should stay with swinging, but in a different way. When there are more people involved, you’ll need to rethink how you usually communicate during sex. Your new community won’t yet know your body language, or what your preferences are. It can be daunting to open up to a room full of people, but you’re bound to get more out of it if you do. You can also try dirty talk to make it even hotter.

Most importantly, however, you’ll need to keep a clear line of trust and communication open if you’re there with a partner. This promises you both a comfortable, fun time that you can bond over for years to come.

DO practice safe sex while swinging

We hear all the time about how sex can go wrong; swinging is no exception. In these kinds of environments, there’s more chance of there being drink and drugs involved to enhance the sexual contact between swingers. The thing is that many of these drugs are illegal in Ireland. When you’re inebriated, it can become easier for your usual safe sex principles to slip. Though there’s nothing wrong with having a drink or two, make sure you aren’t crossing any lines of consent before indulging in a little swinging.

This becomes all the more important when you’re bringing something like BDSM into the mix. Just recently, a man died at a BDSM swingers party in Kent. That’s not to say that words that BDSM can’t be done safely; it can. With the right equipment, communication, and safeguards in place, you’re bound to have a wild time.

DON’T be afraid to say no

Swingers communities are a great place to let loose and explore sexual fantasies you might never have dreamed about before. Despite this, it’s easy to feel pressured into performing certain sexual acts- just because everyone else is involved. Though you might be worried about not fitting in, remember that you should never do anything you aren’t comfortable with. Not only can doing this taint your view of the wonderful world of swinging, but you won’t be getting as much out of this experience as your partner.

The great thing about swinging is that the right community will never judge you for saying no. They will be supportive and encouraging of your kinks, and you can also bet that there’s someone else in exactly the same position as you. You never know, you might get more out of watching it one night than you do participating in it.

DO have an open mind when swinging

Like many kinks, fetishes and fantasies, swinging should not be considered without an open mind. Living in a society that places so much importance on monogamy can make it difficult to embrace swinging without feeling ashamed of it, even when you aren’t in a couple. To enjoy swinging fully, it’s best to reassess these ideals and understand how, though swinging might not work for everyone, it could for you.

It isn’t just about having an open mind with your relationship, but with your desires. From the moment you step into a swingers party, you’ll have the chance to try out some new bedroom antics. From orgies to voyeurism; cuckolding to BDSM, being open to these experiences can take your sex life to the next level.