Drink can have a bad affect on some people. Fights, arguments, cheating; it can all be come back, on numerous occasions to alcohol. But having sex with an ATM and a picnic table? You need to be a special kind of drunk to consider doing that!

Making a Deposit

This is what happened to a 49-year-old Tennessee man Lonnie Hutton, who waltzed into a restaurant, pulled down his pants and tried to have sex with a cash machine. Talk about trying to make a deposit!

Unsurprisingly, the staff were less than impressed, and ordered him outside to wait at a picnic table until the police turned up.

Police say he then “exposed himself again and engaged in sexual intercourse with a picnic table.”

Outdoor Fun

Officers noted in their police report that Hutton smelled of alcohol, had slurred speech, bloodshot eyes and was also unsteady on his feet. Unsurprisingly, he was charged with public intoxication and taken straight to jail on a $250 bond. He is due in court on July 1.

I would have loved to see the face of those happy patrons of Boro Bar and Grill who were having their dinner, only for Lonnie Hutton to rock up and start shagging the ATM. That will be one to tell the grandkids!

Maybe he should have sobered up and gone to see an escort? If the Tennessee escorts are anything like the Galway escorts over here, then they are a far better than having fun with an ATM and a Picnic table. And he wouldn’t be a source of ridicule the world over.

Lay off the ale, Lonnie Hutton!

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Martin Ward

Martin Ward is a well respected editor and writer with over five years experience in the adult industry. After stints in the Escort Advertising call centre and on the escort forum, he moved into the site editor position around three years ago.

Since then, he has specialised in articles on the battle for equal rights for sex workers, sexual health, as well as bringing the readers fun news from around the world. He also has a major interest in LGBT rights, and is an active campaigner in this field.

When he isn't fighting the good fight, he enjoys spending time with his girlfriend, and young daughter. He also enjoys reading and taking long walks.

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