I’ve been a sex worker or an escort, courtesan, companion, however you want to call it for the last five years…I’ve seen and lived many experiences, most of them extraordinary, but there was always a question that pestered me for a long time. What do men who visit escorts expect to get and what do they actually get?
We see advertisements of the erotic nature everywhere, in newspapers, on the internet, even in bus stops (yes, I’m not joking), we see gorgeous models, adult stars, erotic photos, but what is it that men expect to see when the lady they visit opens the door? What is it that they’re after? Whether it’s just a quick fuck and go, or a longer booking, what turns a guy on? What would his ideal meeting be like?
I’m no stranger to time wasters, look and go guys, or extremely demanding people and I may or may not have let down clients (I hope I didn’t, but I’m sure that I did) and I’m a regular visitor to the reviews sections (call me crazy, but I really want to reach that one hundred reviews mark even though I don’t really want to be remembered for that).
If most reviews are amazing, praising the lady in question for her looks, service, presence, friendliness there are some that stick out like a sore thumb in my opinion. “She wasn’t the girl in the photos”, “she is fatter than the photos”, “her photos are airbrushed to the maximum”, “she didn’t offer me the services advertised”, “mechanical service”- these are a couple of the examples I’ve read.
What is it that made these men so unhappy or betrayed that they decide to leave a negative review?
At The Beginning
I remember when I first started doing this job(yes I see it as a job) and I honestly had no fucking clue about it. Literally. I just took some home made photos (of shitty quality I might add), threw in a description and hoped for the best. I didn’t know how to promote myself properly, and often I welcomed my clients in joggers, pyjamas, house slippers and with my hair poking out in all directions and zero makeup. Honestly, I was the epitome of laid back attitude.
Strangely I never felt being rejected and I was actually surprised to see that those people who called me (and saw how I greeted them) were more into that version of me. Sure, some would’ve asked me to dress up, but the vast majority was relaxed and happy that they got the laid back, girl next door, rather than a woman wearing sky high heels, makeup and sexy lace underwear.
As time passed, I became more conscious about the image I wanted to transmit. I took professional photos (photoshop and all), I paid more attention to the way that I greeted my clients and it became a routine to have a full face of makeup, wear heels and find new methods of impressing my clients.
It worked out for a while, until I ended up having my first “look and go” clients, saying I am not the girl in the photos, that I don’t have the exact same makeup, hair colour, etc.
So what do men actually want? Do they want the girl next door or the girl looking like a pornstar?
In my personal opinion you can never ever go wrong when you mix both. Men love a woman who is comfortable in her own skin, who exudes confidence and who can make them forget about the daily grinds, even for a couple of minutes.
Advertisements are out there with the sole purpose of attracting. It’s a marketing strategy. If I were a guy I’d go absolutely bonkers seeing a photo of a sexy girl in lace underwear, high heels, suspenders and all of that. But those guys who fantasise about the girl in high heels often want the girl next door.
Because that girl next door makes them feel safe, comfortable, wanted.
I’ve also met clients who have specifically requested me in different outfits and when to their surprise I opened the door in jeans and a t-shirt, wearing my best smile, they felt the happiest men on earth (yes they confessed that to me).
That’s all about the visual side of things. Now onto the communication side of things.
I like to make tea or coffee for longer bookings, I feel that a good chat and laugh makes things a thousand times easier before you get down to business. It breaks the whole ‘business transaction’ idea that we have imprinted in our heads when we exchange the envelope, give out a gift, and compliment the lady in question. It’s not humanly possible to have sex for two or three hours straight no matter how horny you are. (It hurts like hell)
Since escorting is a personal and interactive experience I’ve seen some complain that the lady in question wasn’t engaging, was mechanical, didn’t smile etc. But those complaining don’t ask themselves one question ‘Did I do anything to offend this lady?’or ‘Am I the reason why she is acting like this?’.
We aren’t machines, programmed to do a cycle of things until the time runs out and sometimes our attitude is based on your actions. A rough touch, a bad word or a nasty attitude from your side, will only make us want you out the door as quick as possible, service or no service. There’s no amount of money in this world that would make anyone accept a bad attitude.
And now the answer to the question: do men get what they expect from an escort? Most of the times yes, sometimes no and sometimes maybe…and sometimes they need to be reminded that we aren’t perfect, neither are they…but we sure as hell love to try.
So as a guy who visits escorts…What was your worst experience with an escort? What was the thing that you expected and didn’t get? I’d sure love to hear your comments.
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