Beauty contests judge and rank physical attributes. Some contests like the Miss Universe competition take personality, intelligence, talent and answering questions as judged criteria. Yet not all contests. Some contests focus on just the sexy bits of the body!
At the 3rd Annual Smallest Penis Contest, size doesn’t matter! According to Aimee Arciuolo, the pageant’s creator, the inspiration for the small prick pageant arose from an ‘amazing’ tiny dick sexual experience. Arciuolo told Playboy that once upon a sexy time, she had a tryst with a dude that came right out and told her, “I’ve got a small pecker but don’t worry, we are going to have some fun.’ And they did! Later she was gabbing to her girlfriends about their short, hot affair and she exclaimed, ‘Someone should throw these small peckers a pageant!”
Hosted in Brooklyn, the Smallest Penis Contest roots for the underdick. Having a small penis can be alienating. The SPC likes to believe they’ve created a platform for tiny pricks to feel like they’re a big deal. The contest is divided into three parts: evening wear, talent and swim wear. The prize is two hundred dollars, a crown and a scepter. But the real trophy is throwing away the stigma that a small cock is not sexually satisfying.
It’s not about the size of the cock, it’s about the passion of the shagging!
Aren’t they just objectifying body parts? Um, yeah. Objectifying isn’t necessarily a bad thing. The contestants don’t object because they know they’ve got the goods! It’s like looking at fruit at the market. That papaya knows that it’s juicy and succulent. It took a sexy evolution for that papaya to develop and ripen to it’s tastiest taste. It deserves recognition and praise! That papaya wants you to know that it knows that it’s juicy and succulent!
The Vagina Beauty Pageant is the brainchild of Brain Sloan who invented the Autoblow2. Autoblow is a company that’s created a machine that performs artificial blow jobs. Sloan created The Vagina Beauty Pageant to search for the world’s most aesthetically pleasing vulva so he could put that pussy on a pedestal. He wanted to find a model for the future Autoblow2 which would use a ‘vagina sleeve’ to simulate sexual sensation rather than a rubber mouth. 182 pussies submitted their muff shots and they were ranked and voted on by 1.2 million visitors from 191 countries.
Turns out, the winner’s photo was a lot less explicit than other papaya entries. Her papaya was shaved and compact and resembled a smooth clamshell. Nell whose from Scotland said that her boyfriend always told her that, “you have a cute, chubby vagina.” Her papaya’s picture was shown from behind and it won her the title of ‘The Woman with the most beautiful vagina in the World’. Nell received a $5,000 grand prize and was flown to have her pussy 3D scanned for Sloan’s sex toy.
Nell from Scotland awarded ‘The Woman with the most beautiful Papaya in the World’ modestly insists, “It’s all about the wrapping rather than the gift.”
What’s awesome about The Smallest Penis Contest and The Vagina Beauty Pageant is that they judge natural bodies. They only accept contestants that accept themselves. This year the contestants of the Miss BumBum Contest had to prove that they had not undergone surgery and that they haven’t used any chemical products on their derrière before.
The previous year, a runner up in the Miss BumBum pageant nearly died after a booty implant in her rump began to rot. Caucau Oliver, the organizer of the contest assures that, “The Miss Bum-Bum competition is to elect Brazil’s most beautiful bum.” The judges do not seek to judge a plastic surgeon’s 2pm appointment. The judges want to judge what her mama and Mother Nature gave her.
The Miss BumBum Contest is a cheeky competition held in Brazil. Brazil is a country full of Carnival beauties that reportedly get their asses insured by insurance companies! More than 500 women took part in the pageant this year. Only fifteen were invited to Sao Paolo and only one was awarded the ‘Rear of the Year.’ This year it was Miss Cortez’s bootliscious booty from Distrito Federal that kicked every one else’s ass!
Miss Bumbum 2015 confesses that her perfect ass comes from, “diet and rigorous training.”
Beauty contests have been held as far back as 1839. They have all qualified and judged beauty. Typically, the judging criteria tries to judge her whole package like in the Miss Universe Competition. Yet sexual organ beauty pageants like The Smallest Penis Contest and The Miss Bumbum Contest focus on just the package. Sexual Organ Beauty Pageants like The Vagina Beauty Pageant let kinky body parts that don’t often see the light of day, have their day in the sun!
She is certainly most famous for her informative, yet hilarious looks at sex from around the world. However, she is also well known for her erotic stories, as well as her blogs on sexual health, which she sees as vital in helping out men and women everywhere.
When she is not knocking other trending articles out of the park, Gabriella likes walking her pet dog, and eating at nice restaurants.
- An Interview with… Anna! - July 21, 2023
- Car Sex – The Ultimate Guide - July 11, 2016
- Six Tips For The Ultimate Quickie - July 4, 2016
Please log in here to leave a comment.