Aptly described as ‘mummy porn,’ Fifty Shades Of Grey took-off when an English, London based writer self-published her own book, portraying a fiery relationship between a professional Dom and his reluctant Submissive. The book is internationally acclaimed and has pushed the boundaries of modern erotic literature, giving readers an insight into the secretive world of professional Dominants and Submissives.
Fifty Shades of Grey has since opened the floodgates for opinionated BDSM adventurists, who have put forward their own take on the interesting and intriguing lifestyles which dominate *no pun intended* the pages of the book, now a trilogy.
One writer, Sophie Morgan, has written a book entitled ‘The Diary of a Submissive’ detailing her experience from a first-hand point of view as a professional submissive, in which she dubs Fifty Shades ‘stereotypical’ and ‘fake.’
Despite the criticism, E L James, Fifty Shade’s sparky writer has been adored the world over for the creation of the central character’s blossoming relationship, in which it is portrayed as a turbulent rollercoaster of power, love, passion and control. In the end, the characters ‘settle down’ and are able to maintain a real, deep relationship together.
One of the criticisms of the book is the way Christian Grey, the handsome and brooding dom is depicted as being a very broken, psychologically damaged individual, in which his passion for control and power is driven by memories of a neglectful and abusive childhood. In fact, the name of the book Fifty Shades of Grey refers to when he calls himself ‘fifty shades of f****d up.’
The story makes for a romantic and interesting read, two souls coming together to heal each other from their painful pasts, but it does beg the question of truth and clarity. Are all subs and doms broken people, using their deep desire to control or be controlled as an outlet to harbour haunting memories of abuse and neglect?
We investigate the world of real-life doms and submissives.
Where it all Began
Sadomasochism is not a brand new concept, it has been round since the ancient times. In the Roman era, sexuality and nudity was seen in a different light than today and naked Roman bathing were ever popular and accepted. Slavery was an accepted part of society, slaves were a status symbol and the masters who bought their slaves would purchase them for sexual use as an added bonus. There were even ‘pricking boys,’ which were teenage boys who acted as sexual slaves for their master, which in the time did not call into question the master’s sexuality. The master in ancient drawings is always depicted as a sexually dominant type with his sexual slaves by his side, female and male, a nod to the man’s prowess and virility.
Christian Grey’s Playroom and Real Life BDSM Resources
In the modern era, Sadomasochism is still prevalent part of sexuality, thousands of specialised websites and pornography production companies are devoted to the phenomenon. Even in Ann Summers, the more ‘soft porn’ side of the scale has taken to producing Christian Grey outfits, whips, rods and blindfolds. Dominance and submission is attractive to both sexes and both sexes can enjoy being the dominated or the submissive party. There are sites which even sell cages, chains and specialised equipment, showing that Christian Grey’s playroom, where he recreates his dom desires, are indeed real.
Professional Domination Contracts
In the book, Fifty Shades of Grey, Christian Grey writes up a contract in which his new submissive, Ana has to sign and agree to. These include things like concepts of ‘punishment’ and even things like diet and exercise to keep her ‘strong’ for him. The author of ‘Diary of a Real Life Submissive,’ Sophie Morgan disagrees submissives are contracted, arguing that being a submissive isn’t about being a living sex doll who’ll put up with anything that the partner wants them to do. She argues that power play is two sided, with both participants enjoying and setting boundaries together. Subs who have come forward with their stories don’t agree to or advocate the use of contracts, which may have been a clever fabrication to keep hearts racing when reading E L James’s book.
Punishment
The shy Ana Steele, much to reader’s delight and awe, is regularly punished when she goes against Christian Grey’s instructions, he spanks her with a hard belt for going against his wishes in their ordinary life, is punishment like this real? Sophie Morgan advises that not all punishment is this way inclined and the type depicted in the novel actually borders on abusive. Of course, pain and punishment go hand-in-hand within the dynamics of a sadomasochistic relationship, but most people do not settle disputes in their private lives through their sexual adventures, she disagrees that this is a normal aspect of power play and to warn against these acts which show as horrific jealousy and manipulation. She speculates dominance should always be fun for both parties and boundaries should always be set.
Are Doms and Submissives ‘Broken’?
With so many individuals jumping on the Fifty Shades bandwagon, it makes no sense to categorise all people who engage in a little BDSM as ‘broken’ and damaged goods. Of course, just like all sexual acts which tip the scale into controversy, there is always the hard-core side of the story, which can be dangerous and has abusive connotations, but mostly, sub and dom relationships are more sedate. Real life submissives disagree that fantasising about BDSM means they are being mishandled in some way. Sophie Morgan describes it as liberating she also demands why having a foot fetish for example isn’t analysed as being mentally ill or broken, so why does indulging in BDSM make her any different? She may have a point. Although, it is always best to assume boundaries and to feel comfortable – as comfortable as possible in a BDSM situation! You must both feel mentally comfortable and not be pushed to do something you don’t want to do.
Despite the arguments surrounding Fifty Shades of Grey, one thing it has achieved is to bring people’s individual fantasies into the spotlight and encourage people to embrace them on a whole new level. Erotic fiction will continue to enchant many a reader and Fifty Shades of Grey is just one of the many ways to get in touch with and enjoy your sexual fantasies.
Our directory has numerous Dublin Domination escorts who can help you venture into this naughty world. Why not ask give one of them a call? If you have the guts!
Since then, he has specialised in articles on the battle for equal rights for sex workers, sexual health, as well as bringing the readers fun news from around the world. He also has a major interest in LGBT rights, and is an active campaigner in this field.
When he isn't fighting the good fight, he enjoys spending time with his girlfriend, and young daughter. He also enjoys reading and taking long walks.
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